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Friday, 25 July 2014

Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me. That's not true.

The truth is, words do MORE than break your bones. They break your heart.

Isn't it amazing how a few words can change everything? "I want a divorce."

What have you said that's been hurtful? What has your spouse said to you that broke your heart or poisoned your relationship?

In frustration or rage, people say the dumbest things and use the most obscene language. Even if you or your spouse didn't mean to say it, once it's said, the damage is done.

It's like tearing open a down-pillow in a wind storm. You desperately want to get the feathers back, but they're blowing in every direction. Like feathers of a pillow, hurtful words are irretrievable.

That's why it's so important for spouses to learn to control themselves and watch what they say.

You see, there's actually a MARITAL reason you have 2 ears and only 1 mouth. It's because you're supposed to LISTEN twice as much as you talk. Imagine how different your marriage would be if you and your spouse did that.  Why not start playing nice today?

Posted by: Tana AT 08:30 am   |  Permalink   |  Email
Friday, 18 July 2014

Here are 4 things that you can let go of that will make you a happier, more peaceful person by the time you hit the sack tonight:

1) Let go of the need to impress others. 

If you're a human being, chances are you care about what other people think of you. 

After all - we are naturally social creatures!

But if you find yourself spending too much of your time, money or energy trying to impress other people and get their approval, you're not being true to YOU.

There's no need to try and be something you're not, because who you are right now is FABULOUS!

Focus instead on living the most authentic version of yourself. 

When you fully embrace who you are and share it with others, you'll find that people will appreciate how REAL you are and will flock to you effortlessly. :)

2) Let go of the need to be right. 

Sometimes when we feel we've been mistreated or misunderstood by someone, we can get caught up into wanting that person to admit they've wronged us.

And we want an apology! 

Or at least acknowledgement that we are right and they're wrong. :)

The problem is that not all human beings see things from the same perspective. In your world, you're right… but in their world, so are they.

There are definitely times where an apology is necessary. 

But most other times, rather than allowing feelings of negativity to take root inside you and start spilling over into other areas of your life, it may be best to ask yourself this:

"Do I want to be right? Or do I want to be happy?"

Often it's just our ego that keeps us holding on to past resentments and upsets. Instead, consider letting go of the desire to be right and you'll find you'll instantly restore happiness and contentment in your life.

3) Let go of the desire to gossip. 

I've heard it said that gossip is just a cheap way to make yourself feel good, and I have to agree. 

We all know that gossiping about other people is… well, not so good. 

But when the people around you are doing it, it can be easy to slip into doing it, too!

Consider though that the quality of your life depends on the quality of the conversations you have.

If you want to live a more fulfilling life, start by embracing the power of your word. Your voice is powerful! And what you have to say makes a difference.

Be committed to having more positive conversations about things that matter… not people… and you'll be surprised how quickly you'll brighten your outlook on life.

4) Let go of the past. 

It's easy to dwell on the past, especially when the future is so unknown! 

Looking to the past can feel safe… we know what has happened and we know what we could do to change things… if only we had the chance. 

The truth is, though, that you never will have the chance to change the past. 

Not unless scientists finally invent a time machine. ;)

Your past has served its purpose - it's brought you to the place you are today and made you the person you are now. And who you are right now is absolutely perfect. 

Be grateful for your experiences, but know that NOW is all you have. So do your best to enjoy each moment. Give yourself the gift of being present!   To your everlasting happiness,

Posted by: Tana AT 09:23 am   |  Permalink   |  Email
Tuesday, 01 July 2014

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Posted by: Tana AT 04:42 pm   |  Permalink   |  Email
Thursday, 12 June 2014

Anyone in a relationship or who plans on being in one needs to know how to keep love alive over the long term.

Yes, about 50% of couples get divorced. Another 10-15% separate but do not file paperwork. And 7 more percent are chronically unhappy.

So the real stat is two-thirds of marriages do not live “happily ever after.”

Why is marriage so hard over the long term?

One of the main reasons is what science calls it “habituation.” Which is a fancy way of saying we get bored.

So you need to actively keep the marriage happy. How do you do that?

1.  Don't fix the bad increase the good.

2.  Forget romance think excitement.

3.  Pretend you're on a first date.

Posted by: Tana AT 12:47 pm   |  Permalink   |  Email
Thursday, 05 June 2014

1. Maintain a feeling of control over your situation.

2. Emotional preparation. Consider how things could be worse.

3. Monitor your breathing.

4. Controlled empathy.

5. Ask “What advice would I give my best friend in this situation?”

Posted by: Tana AT 09:44 am   |  Permalink   |  Email
Thursday, 29 May 2014

1. DON'T BE BORING

2. BE A GOOD LISTENER

3. TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE'S INTERESTS

4. HAVE 3 GOOD STORIES TO TELL

5. DON'T FORGET CHARISMA 

6. BE AT PLACES THAT ARE INTERESTING, FUN, EXCITING

7. HANG OUT WITH MORE INTERESTING PEOPLES SO YOU DON'T BECOME GENERIC.

Posted by: Tana AT 04:49 pm   |  Permalink   |  Email
Thursday, 22 May 2014

1.  POSTUREMan tip: Walk upright, don’t slouch and be confident being YOU.

2.  LOOKSMan tip: Make the best of what you’ve got and highlight your strong points.

3.  MANNERISMSMan tip: Keep arrogance and rudeness off the menu and save aggression for the sports arena.

4.  DRESS SENSEMan tip: Refresh your wardrobe with at least two good outfits e.g. a good suit and a nice pair of jeans and shirt.

5.  GROOMINGMan tip: Invest in some good male grooming products and use them regularly.

6.  SMELLMan tip: Shower and brush your teeth daily and use some decent deodorant. I know I say it a lot, but cologne goes a long way here guys!! 

7.  BODYMan tip: Do some regular exercise that you enjoy to stay in shape.   

8.  WHO HE'S WITHMan tip: Keep good company!

9.  SKIN, Man tip: Drink plenty of water and don’t think that skin care products are for females only.

10. VOICE, Final tip: Relax when you speak and remember… being a gentleman never goes out of style.

Posted by: Tana AT 12:35 pm   |  Permalink   |  Email
Thursday, 15 May 2014

1.  Write it down

Do a brain dump and write everything down that’s on your mind. Writing reduces worry and organizes your thoughts.

2.  Prioritize or Die

You need to prioritize or you will have a clean garage but get fired from your job.

Decide what is important and do that first. Otherwise you may never get to what really matters.

3.  Make things automatic 

Things that are habitual don’t tax your willpower. The more activities you make into habits, the less overwhelmed they will make you feel.

Build routines and habits so that you’re not deciding, you’re just doing.

The secret to getting more done is to make things automatic. Decisions exhaust you

4.  Work like an athlete

We were not designed to go 24/7. We were designed to sprint, rest, sprint — just like an athlete.

You sleep in cycles and your mind naturally works in cycles. Alternate hard work with breaks to be at your best.

5.  Switch to Single-tasking

Forget multitasking. That’s what causes the feelings of burnout and it’s not effective.

Discover what your peak hours are and protect them.

Focus on the most important thing of the day. No interruptions, email or calls.

6.  Live in OHIO

Not the state. It’s an acronym: Only Handle It Once.

That email you’ve opened sixty times today, unsure of what to do with it?

Make a decision. Reply, trash it or set a time to properly deal with it.

Revisiting unimportant things over and over is a huge time and energy thief.

7.  Have leisure goals

Most of us think about “leisure” as doing nothing. But that’s a dangerous way to view it.

Research shows we’re happier when we accomplish things (playing tennis with a friend vs. flipping TV channels.)

And given our habits, we’re prone to start checking email and firing up the usual 17 things we multitask on.

So set a goal for leisure. When you have a fun thing to accomplish, you can singletask on relaxing.

Posted by: Tana AT 11:56 am   |  Permalink   |  Email
Friday, 09 May 2014

Mother’s Day is right around the corner. But don’t feel like you have to break the bank to show mom how much she means to you. After all, the savvy woman who taught you how to make good choices of how to spend your money wouldn’t want that, right?

1. Breakfast in bed. Always a classic, making mom breakfast in bed is sure to be a hit. Add a hand-picked flower in a tiny vase, and you’re good to go.

Dad, if your kids are too little to cook by themselves, drag yourself out of bed early on Mother’s Day to help. While moms everywhere appreciate the effort behind a 100 percent kid-made breakfast in bed, they’d prefer an edible meal to burnt toast and cereal with orange juice.

2. Handprint crafts. What mom doesn’t love to have the memory of her little ones’ tiny handprints? Handprints – whether on paper, in plaster or on a flower pot – make great gifts for moms and grandmas of little ones. Just search Pinterest, and you’ll come up with dozens of handprint crafts. Turn those adorable hands into flowers, butterflies and more. You can even find cute poems to go along with these crafts.

3. Do chores. Whether the mom in your life is a stay-at-home mom, a working mom or an empty-nester grandma, she is busy. So this Mother’s Day weekend, spend Saturday doing chores without being asked so she can enjoy her day, Sunday in that clean house.

Clean the house – including the toilet. Wash the dishes. Do the laundry, and put it away. Just taking these chores off mom’s hands the day before can make Mother’s Day more relaxing for her.

4. Write something. If you have a way with words, consider writing mom a poem, or putting one of your favorite childhood memories to paper. If not, make a list of the things you love about your mom, or jot a note in a handmade card. When it comes to little kids, ask them what they love most about mom, and record their answers.

These are the kinds of things moms treasure, and you can bet she’ll keep this gift of words and read them again and again over the years.

5. Give her time. Some moms – especially in-the-trenches moms of babies to high schoolers – just need a little time to themselves. Ask her about this before Mother’s Day. Maybe she prefers to spend Saturday alone and Mother’s Day with family. Or maybe she’s the opposite.

Either way, try to carve out time for Mom to have some space for herself. Encourage her to go out to lunch with a friend, read a book in bed, SLEEP, or just enjoy having the house to herself while dad and the kids vacate the premises.

6. Make a coupon book. Coupon books are always a hit around Mother’s Day, and the Web abounds with cute printable books for kids of all ages to give to their moms. Or you could make your own coupons.

Need some ideas for coupons you could give your mom or wife? Here are a few:

  • One Movie Night
  • Two Loads of Laundry
  • Help with Gardening
  • Get Out of Bedtime Free
  • Mom’s Choice Chore
  • One Bear Hug
  • One Car Wash
  • One Breakfast in Bed
  • One Night Off Cooking

7. Teach her something. Does your mom want to learn something you’re good at? Maybe something about using her computer, taking good photos with a smartphone or even a craft you know how to do?

Give her a Mother’s Day coupon for a few learning sessions with you. It’s a great way to spend some time together, build memories and teach Mom something new.

8. Trash-to-treasure crafts. The Internet is full of great ideas for crafts made of things you probably have around your house. Help the kids make mom a Shrinky Dink necklace from a plastic container, a desk organizer from cereal boxes or other creative trash-to-treasure crafts.

When you’re choosing a craft, just try to pick something useful or something that won’t take up a lot of space. That way mom can display this work of art without feeling crushed by clutter.

9. Digitized photos. If you were born in the 90s or earlier, chances are that much of your childhood – and your mom’s pre-motherhood life – is captured in printed photos. 

There are photo digitizing services you can use if you’re not completely strapped for cash. But if you have more time than money, you can do it yourself it with a basic home scanner.

10. Time together. Whatever you decide to give your mom or wife this year, be sure time together is on your list. On or around Mother’s Day, plan a family outing with mom. Go to the park, or go on a bike ride if the weather’s nice.  If your a teenager staying home all day is much appreciated for your Mom who wants to be with you.

The time you spend together will be worth more to her than any expensive gift. 

I hope you all enjoy your day with the Moms in your life.

Posted by: Tana AT 08:39 am   |  Permalink   |  Email
Friday, 18 January 2013
 When was the last time you made a commitment to do something, only to realize later on that you wouldn’t be able to accomplish it? Quitting can sometimes be the easiest thing in the world to do – if the task is harder than we expected, or if we have other priorities, or if we just plain old don’t feel like doing it. I’d like to take a few minutes to talk about why some people quit before they start and how quitting can seriously impact your path to success.
 
Some people just seem to be natural-born quitters. They’ll make commitment after commitment, only to later have an excuse as to why it can’t be done. It has been my experience that these people all share one common trait – impulsiveness. They say yes in the heat of the moment, only to later realize that they don’t have the time or energy to get the job done. 
 
If you tend to be an impulsive person, remember your I��Q: Impulsiveness leads to Quitting. Take a day or two to think things over before making any promises. If you are asking for help from someone who has been a quitter, you may want to insist that they take some time to think it over before deciding.
 
Being a compulsive quitter can have a serious impact in your life, both professionally and personally. When I do business with others, I tend to have a one strike and you’re out policy – when someone doesn’t carry through with their commitments and promises, I don’t give them another opportunity to let me down. No one wants to put their trust and their livelihood in the hands of someone who is unreliable.
 
It can also be very self-defeating to never follow through with what you say you’ll do. You can get caught up in a cycle of committing, quitting, and becoming less trustworthy to others and yourself.
 
Remember, it’s better to commit less or not at all than to make promises you can’t keep. Make it a goal this month to do what you say you’ll do, and know when to say no. Good luck!

Posted by: Tana AT 10:58 pm   |  Permalink   |  Email

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